Goodbye...

As I sit here and type this with tears rolling down my cheeks and drinking a very strong gin I realise you don't have much time left my darling Mama. After 87 years, 5 children, 23 grandchildren and 1 great-grandchild, you are now leaving us.

You were the woman who taught me how to cook, how to bake, how to paint my nails and put on makeup. She taught me important rules of how to be a lady and how to have tea. I hate seeing you like this but I take little comfort in knowing that you don't have much longer.



You are a strong and amazing woman, my darling Mama. Now that Bubby's been born you are a great-grandmother as well as a grandmother to so many (one of the perks of having 5 children I suppose). You came to my debating. You watched my minkey. You spent Saturdays with me. You taught me so much. You taught me fierce independence. you taught me audacious humour.

You shouldn't be like this, my Mama. You should be busy being rebellious by drinking brandy alexander's in the morning and going out to dinner and ordering off the children's menu.

Oh Mama, I know you are already well on your way to leaving this world. All I have done today is sat and watched you and held your hand. I had to fight the 20-something other family members off just to get close to you. So many people love you Mama. I know you have to leave me and for selfish reasons I want you to stay. I know you have to go. I'm trying to understand it.




If I'm not around for a while, please don't forget about me. My darling grandmother is about to pass away (the priest has given her her last rites) and I'm struggling with juggling it all. I'm not very good at this.